Your Little Habits Will Change Your Life

Goals are funny things, aren’t they?

Setting goals is the first step in turning the invisible into the visible – Tony Robbins

Whilst they are great motivators, sometimes they can generate the opposite effect.

Hear me out…

I am sure that you could think of a couple that you have right now that you likely felt pressure to set back in January, right? ‘Lose 10kg’…‘reduce the coffee intake’…’stop fighting with your sibling’…

But do you really want to achieve those goals?

For me, over time my goals have ranged anywhere from ‘get that six-pack for your girl’s holiday to Ibiza’ to ‘try not to drink a hot chocolate every night for one week’, both of which I have failed miserably at.

I should really trade the chocolate for bananas

Don’t get me wrong, if you look at me, you might think that I have achieved a lot of goals with my career and life in general, but the ones that require sheer discipline, like weaning yourself off Swiss Hot Chocolate, well, lets just say there is no hope…

However, I am finding that as I age, this ability to become wiser that everyone talks about, is rubbing off on me. I am starting to see those big goals, whilst motivating, can responsible for an awful lot of unnecessary pressure and self-doubt, especially when you don’t achieve them.

That six-pack goal I mentioned has been plaguing me since the age of 17 (talk about 1st world problems). Every year I will be one of the first at the gym in January, new trainers and sweat towel in hand. But I just love food too much to trade it in and become a hermit who drinks protein shakes and has a diet of only salad three times a day. Yet, every year I also rock up to the beach and feel so embarrassed about how I look because I didn’t get the body, that I cover myself with a towel and pray to God no one sees me.

You know the funny thing? There is absolutely nothing wrong with my body. I’m actually pretty strong and not overweight. It’s the fact that I set a big goal that I was not able to achieve, even though the intent was there. That’s the kicker and what makes me feel bad about myself.

Here’s how you’ll usually see me on a beach

Recently, I was gifted the book Atomic Habits by a dear colleague who is one of the five people who reads my blog (thank you, S!) and one example James Clear, the Author, writes about has stuck with me ever since.

In his book which focuses on how to change habits by 1% each day to achieve your goals, James shares the example of how your goal could be to tidy your room. It goes something like this:

• You muster the courage to tidy your room and then you feel so accomplished by the fact that it’s now tidy.

• But then two days later, your room is messy again, and you feel like crap.

James explains that the problem is not the goal you set, but the system you are using to achieve your goal. To keep a tidy room, you must become a tidy person.

Success is the product of daily habits – not once in a lifetime transformation – James Clear

The book is having a profound impact on me as well as the tens of thousands of people who have rated it 5*s on Amazon.

I have shared this in previous blog posts but I started the year not in a particularly great place mentally and without knowing it, I have started to put James’ teachings in practice.

Every morning, I make a cup of matcha tea, I write in my journal about the mindset I want to take into my day and then usually I make it to the gym for strength training (ok, I manage three times per week, but whose counting?). After the gym, I manage to do 10 minutes of meditation (at the moment I’m loving the topic of abundance) and then I get to my desk with my two boiled eggs, ready for the day.

Journaling the first thing in the morning has been a real life-changer for me

These tiny, weeny habits I have been incorporating into my life are not only helping me feel stronger as a person, but they are changing other aspects of my life.

And the best part? They are not difficult at all for me and wouldn’t be for you either.

You see, I believe that when you focus on achieving a big goal – achieve a six pack for example – you immediately think you must change big aspects of your life to succeed. This is where many people fail because a) stopping chocolate and any form of sweet, full cold turkey, is the worst plan on earth and b) they haven’t checked if this is the goal they actually want to achieve and if so, that they have a proper plan in place.

The biggest lesson I’m learning these past few months is that, if you must set big goals, think very carefully about what is needed to achieve them – the system you need in place as James calls it. From there, be very realistic about your timeline and your non-negotiables.

For me, one goal I have is to find ways to bring more creativity into my life. Initially I believed this meant a full, 360 career change, head off to University to study Product Design and then apply to work at Nike, designing the latest carbon-neutral trainer.

But thinking it through, it meant incorporating little things into my life, like starting this blog, journaling of a morning, hunting down damn good coffee in city. And this is way more fun and fulfilling than a career change, let me tell you.

It’s the little details that are vital. Little things make big things happen – John Wooden

If you are also on a similar journey to me, as always, I would love to know how you’re getting on. What little habits do you build into yoru day and when do you start to see them taking effect? Please let me know in the comments section below.

See you soon,

Mashed Banana x

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